Finding My True Identity

In this blog post I continue looking at what I have personally learned from the Jonah story. We saw that the meaning of Jonah’s name was ‘Dove’, yet his social group had moulded him to be a hawk. He was living according to the truth that he had received from his father Amittai (whose name meant ‘Truth’). His true spiritual Father, who gave birth to the whole creation, was calling him to see a greater, more expansive truth. This truth was that the ‘Blessings of God’ were available to all the people on earth, even the enemies of his Jewish social group. He was also leading Jonah to recognize and embrace his true identity which was a reflection of his name. I previously mentioned that in Scripture the name of a person often referred to their identity. Yet, Jonah resisted both extending the blessing of God beyond his social group and embracing the reality of his true identity.

What I have been confronted by in this time of transformation that I have been through in the last six years is that I did not know who I really am. I (like every other person) have been created, as Scripture tells us, ‘in the Image of God’ (Genesis 1:26-27). At the core of my being I am therefore a unique reflection of God. However, I did not know what this unique refection is. Like Jonah I had taken on a perception of who I was which accorded with what my social conditioning made me believe I was. My perception of my identity was a reflection of my place within my social group. This was in terms of various overall criteria such as nationality, class, language group, race (especially in South Africa), gender etc. More specifically it had to do with my education level and my perceived gifts and talents. All these factors impacted on my performance and level of achievement in terms of what my society valued as being desirable. In my society success was primarily valued in terms of accumulating wealth (and conspicuous consumption); gaining status (along with status symbols); and exercising power. My perception of my identity was therefore related to these factors; and the degree to which I measured up according to them. They were the external criteria of success and achievement. Especially as a man they were the measure of whether or not I was ‘enough of a man’. This identity I took on I call my ‘social identity,’ because it was rooted in my social situation.

The Christian Church has rightly taught through the centuries the Biblical truth that because of the sin of Adam we his descendents were cut off from relationship with God. Jesus died in order to redeem us from that reality and restore our relationship with God; and this enabled us to become adopted sons and daughters of our True Heavenly Father. This radically changes our status, from being slaves to sin and under the dominion of the ‘Prince of this World’ (Satan), to being members of the family of our True Father, and under his authority.

The Church has however neglected to emphasize the fact that not only are we cut off from our heavenly Father, we are also cut off from our True Self; that part of us that is created in the image of God. There has been a tendency to focus on the sinfulness and depravity of mankind to the exclusion of the reality that we are created in the image of God. This was taken to great height during the Protestant Reformation, especially within Calvinism. If people are constantly told: “You are bad, rotten to the core!” then they end up believing it. It tragically gives them a distorted perception of reality. They fail to recognize the image of God within them.

It has been largely left to the mystics of the Christian Church to retain the reality of the necessity of being re-united with both God and our True Self. They have safe- guarded this reality from being lost. Our True Self is who God created us to be at the core of our being. It is imprinted within us from birth, in the same way that our genetic coding is imprinted within our DNA. This is the basis of our True Identity, which is rooted in our relationship with our True Father. I have had to come to a place of seeing that my true identity is not the ‘social identity’ I took on by virtue of my place within my social group; and my achievements in that context. That was a very conditional identity, which was based on my social heritage and performance. This initial identity that I took on was in fact a ‘False Identity’. This was a distorted perception of reality - an illusion. I am not who I thought I was. This illusory false identity was the persona (or mask) that I hid behind to play out the drama of the first half of my life. It took the ‘Jonah experience’ that I have described in this blog to enable me to begin to recognize a higher and more expansive reality.  It was a difficult and painful experience, but without it I would still be trapped within my false identity.

The problem with our illusions is that they are much like prisons; we become trapped within them and cannot escape without something extraneous impacting on us. What I have come to see is that ultimately this is a spiritual condition. We have an adversary whose mission is to hurt and destroy us; and keep us under his control. Scripture tells us that our adversary is a liar and the father of lies. He is also a master salesman. It is he who sells us the lie that our social identity is our only identity; and as soon as we buy that lie we become trapped in a false identity. We therefore become cut off from our true identity. Satan aims to keep us in that state of illusion, because it separates us from coming to know the “fullness of life” that Jesus died in order for us to receive. Only in coming to know and embracing our True Self can we find our True Identity. This identity is not conditional and dependent on our heritage and performance; but unconditional. We just have to receive it as a free gift from a loving Father. This is a transcendent identity, rooted in our True Heavenly Father and not in society.

This sounds so simple and obvious. However, in my experience there are few people who I have met within the Christian Church who seem to live out of this reality. They accept their salvation that Jesus bought as a ransom by giving his life for theirs, but then soon slip into an ‘Elder Brother’ mentality of joyless labour trying to earn their Fathers love. They are also still trapped in the reality of their false self that they have been conditioned by their society since young to adopt as being their only self. Living out of the reality of our True Identity does not come easily; and requires nothing less than the power of the Holy Spirit; and going through an experience similar to what Jonah went through, of being swallowed by a fish; in whatever guise the Lord chooses to send it.

Questions for reflection;

·         How do you respond to what I have written?

·         Are you living out of your True Identity?

·         Is this something that you want?